A Year of Good Conversation

year one Not My Story.png

This week, Not My Story turns one—and what a year it has been! When I conceived the idea for a podcast about faith and the unexpected (having no idea what 2020 would bring), I did not anticipate the other side of these conversations—how every story would weave their way not only into my own narrative, but also the narratives of so many others. Each episode has left its impact.

But what struck me the most in hearing and holding guests’ stories are the themes that have echoed throughout each conversation. Even in situations that looked different, with guests of varying personalities and demographics, we heard murmurs of a greater Story—of a God who meets us in the unplanned pieces of our lives.

As I have reflected further, I have a few things I want to take with me from this first year of curating stories and asking questions. These are the whispers that keep sneaking up on me and working their way into my bones—a few lessons from a year of good conversation.

Presence outweighs answers.

When life doesn’t go as planned, all kinds of questions emerge. Questions about what is fair. Questions about God’s character. Questions about how to move forward or to make meaning. Questions about how to relate to people and how to grieve. The questions exceed the answers.

Yet, in almost every story, I heard how God’s nearness filled in the gaps left by unanswered questions. Not always immediately. Not always with the same intensity. Sometimes it came through the tangible presence of a person or through a knowing of the soul that is too beautiful and mysterious to wrap in words. But each podcast guest spoke tenderly of a God who came near.

Most stories also highlighted the presence of other people. In episode 25, Jodi Rosser talked about her life after divorce, noting that when life is falling apart, “People just want the gift of presence.” Almost every guest echoed this sentiment. Quick platitudes and easy answers didn’t satisfy, but friends who showed up became the tangible hands and feet of the Divine. It seems too simple, but for the soul, presence outweighs answers.

The unexpected is an invitation into more of God.

One of my favorite questions to ask guests is what they know about God that they didn’t know before the unexpected season or circumstance. Thirty episodes in, I have not yet had a guest who, on the other side of an unplanned life event, have described God as more vengeful or rigid than they imagined. Rather, nearly every time I ask the question, the guest’s whole countenance seems to soften as he or she speaks of a God who is kind and merciful, comforting with grief, and lavish with love.

Dorina Lazo Gilmore-Young (episode 17) spoke tenderly how “God cares about even the smallest place of sadness.” While loss leaves gaps, that hollowed-out space longs to be filled, and each ache is an invitation into a fuller, wider, more-beautiful connection with God himself.

Stories reveal our shared humanity.

No two stories on the podcast have been exactly the same, and no two people alike. From gender to ethnicity to experience to age, each guest has brought a unique lens on the world. But what I find in hearing their stories is a common flesh—a shared humanity. Even in circumstances that look nothing alike, there is a sacred overlap in their experiences of being human. Of hoping and hurting. Of celebration and anger. Of wanting to know and to be known, to have a place to belong.

Stories connect us. They offer us an in-between where information and opinions fail, because even if our convictions do not align, we can relate to searing pain of losing a loved one, the shame of rejection, or the fluttering magic of falling in love. Stories show what we have in common and offer us a way back to each other, back the fundamentals of what makes us wonderfully woven together.

***

This year of good conversations has been a gift—and I am so grateful to each guest who has generously offered us a piece of their journeys, their time, and their authenticity. I am grateful for every Not My Story listener who has played a part, shared an episode, or reached out to share your own unexpected twists and turns. It’s been a great first year—and I hope you’ll join us in the year ahead for even more conversations about faith and the unexpected.


CELEBRATE WITH US!

Whether you’re new to Not My Story or have been around since episode 1 with my husband Ben, help us celebrate the podcast’s first birthday by sharing your favorite episode with a friend or in the comments below.

AND if you want to enter our GIVEAWAY while you’re at it, hop on over to the Not My Story Instagram page, find the image at the top of this post, and follow the instructions to ENTER TO WIN a digital backstage pass to a future Not My Story recording. (Giveaway ends on April 30, 2021, and winner will be announced on Instagram and in episode 31 of the Not My Story podcast on May 5, 2021.)